Merry Christmas, Miran

Dearest Miran,

This is your first Christmas (sort of). I hope you come to look forward to and treasure this holiday as much as I always have and that it dots your childhood with magical, memorable experiences. More importantly, I hope that what people often call the "true meaning" of Christmas is something you will come to feel deeply, not just on Christmas, but throughout your life. May you always know a sense of internal peace and know that you are loved, by your family and by God.

This is a bittersweet day for me. You see, at this time last year, I still had your big brother with me. I had lots of dreams for him, and I spent a lot of time imagining what this day would be like with him here, as a baby. I miss him very much.

But Miran, I no longer wish to undo the past. I am at peace with the fact that he was meant to be our baby in heaven, and you were meant to be our baby on earth, keeping us up at night! I would not go back now or change what happened, because I wouldn't trade you for anything.

Miran, someday you'll read this, and I want you to know that your daddy and I love you so much and have from the very minute we knew you were on your way. We wish you a Merry Christmas, and we look forward to many more very happy Christmases with you. I hope it becomes your favorite time of year.

Love,
Mother